Friday Dopuble Post: 2- On Getting an Award

Last Friday, on the occasion of AP Formation Day, I got an Íncentive Award’’ that I had the privilege of receiving from the Chief Minister himself at a public function. It was a big moment for me and I was happy especially since the award included twenty thousand rupees along with a certificate. This was the biggest award in my almost twenty years of service and I am very pleased that I got it since I can now retire with some satisfaction. The irony is that I never wanted to be in the Government service in the first place and I still do not want to. But since I’ve been here for two decades I guess I will hang on for another couple of years and then maybe take voluntary retirement. Afterwards, I want to travel and also write.

The Sunday before the previous Sunday you should have seen me, or more particularly, my face. You’d have seen the sullen face of someone who had been working round the clock for almost a week without a break, without anything of a social or a family life, of someone filled with resentment for having forced to work on holidays also, especially Sunday, of someone who isn’t eating properly at the proper times, of someone who isn’t sleeping well. It was the face of someone who was pissed off with what his work was extracting from him. Sunday was the day when this anger and resentment peaked since I was told I had to come to the office for the whole day. The week long rains and floods had turned my life upside down what with hundreds of calls to attend and hundreds of chores to manage. I did not mind all this because there were people out there actually suffering due to the continuous heavy downpour and floods. I did not know what was making me angry. Sometime recently when I sat and listed out the probable reasons I realized it was my mobile phone that was making me angry. Every time I got a call on the mobile phone or had to make a call I had to go out of my house and do it which filled me with unusual anger against Airtel. I do not understand how they can claim to offer coverage all over the country when I cannot get signals in the heart of the city.

Anyway, after I heard the news about the incentive award I calmed down. But I am not able to stop thinking how anyone thought I deserved the award when I did not do anything extraordinary and just did what I was expected to do.